


Because You're You

by Atlas_corp



Category: Borderlands (Video Games), Tales from the Borderlands - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Depression, Fluff, M/M, Paranoia, Rhys doesn't believe it, Suicide Attempt, Triggers, im bad at tagging, jack loves rhys, severe anxiety
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-10-20 19:31:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17628317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atlas_corp/pseuds/Atlas_corp
Summary: After a failed suicide attempt by Rhys, Jack realizes how much the younger man really has been keeping from him. His goal is to break down those walls to help Rhys recover and understand that he's loved, that Jack loves him.It's a constant battle inside of Rhys' head- will he believe Jack, or the demons taking him over?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> TW: Suicide attempt, vomitting, anxiety attack

 He felt a heaviness on his chest as the tears dripped down his cheeks, the young man curled tightly into a ball in the corner of the bedroom. Jack had left for what he claimed to be a very short amount of time, to get Rhys’ medication, however, the older man seemed to be taking longer than Rhys was comfortable with. It had been an hour and a half now, his lover’s promise of a short trip to the pharmacy and back felt more like an excuse to get away from the younger man. The thought made sense to Rhys as he picked at his lip, the soft skin peeling off as he nagged at it, blood beginning to drip from his top and bottom ones and dribbling down his chin, staining his fidgety fingertips as they subconsciously searched for more of the small flaps of skin to rip off. He couldn’t even feel anything other than the warm trickle of fluid down his chin, feeling the soft weight lessen as it fell to the carpeted floor with a soft noise that was barely heard. Rhys let out a strained breath as he silently degraded himself, his fucked mind insisting it knew why Jack hadn’t returned.

 

 

 

 

Jack no longer wanted Rhys. That must be it..Jack had taken so much time off his job to take care of Rhys, to help him stay safe and feel loved...maybe that’s what it was. It must be- it all made sense; Rhys was burdening Jack by just existing, by just being there. “God..” The boy whispered in a strangled way, voice cracking as a sob escaped his swollen, bloody lips. His previously chewed nails scratched at his bare arms, frantic movements up and down until each scratch burned like fire and was a bright red streak down the sides of his arms, breaths growing heavier and quicker as he let his intense depression cloud his view.

 

 

 

How could he be so stupid..how could he have not noticed his partner’s distaste and discomfort before? _How could he be so fucking selfish?_ Suddenly, Rhys felt his breath completely leave him, his hands slamming violently against the bloodied carpet as his wide, multi-coloured eyes stared intensely at the floor, his lip bleeding profusely and dripping rhythmically from his mouth. The boy’s chest heaved rapidly, breaths gasping for air in desperate attempt to breathe again as a loud groan of panic escaped him. I’m drowning, he thought in a panic, strangled noises of distress sounding from his throat. _I’m drowning_ He thought in a panic, strangled noises of distress sounding from his throat. I _can’t breathe ImdrowningImdrowningohgodpleasesomebodyhelpme-_

“Rhys!”

 

 

 

The young man’s thoughts went quiet for a second, the familiar voice pulling him back to the surface of reality. It was only a moment later he realized he was being shaken. “Rhys! Stay with me, please baby, don’t fall asleep!” It was Jack’s voice. In an instant, he was yanked back into the hard reality of what was going on- finding himself limply laying on the wooden tile of the living room floor, shallow breaths causing his chest to rise and fall and his lover hovering over him with tearful eyes as he shook the younger man desperately.

 

 

 

“J...ah..k..” was all the cyborg could manage out through what tasted like vomit in his mouth, his sounds strangled and almost unintelligible. Jack looked at him with tearfully intense eyes, strong hands holding Rhys’ pale face. “It’s gonna be okay, Rhysie..don’t you worry you’re gonna be fine- j-just don’t go to sleep.” The older man whispered insistently, the cyborg’s eyebrows furrowing in confusion before trying his hardest to roll over to his side, a strange feeling in his throat. Jack was hesitant, almost immediately stopping him until the younger man began to heave, vomit erupting from his throat like water from a faucet as it spread onto the floor. Jack worriedly pat Rhys’ back with care, the young man’s throat flexing and stomach tightening as his body desperately tried to expel whatever he had taken, even when nothing was coming out. Jack looked at Rhys solemnly as the young boy lay on his back again, various fluids dripping down his cheek from the corners of his mouth, chest heaving with strain as each breath seemed to take a large amount of energy.

 

 

 

“Wh...hap...n..” Rhys managed through sputtering breaths, Jack’s eyebrows furrowed tightly in concern as he wiped Rhys’ mouth with a tissue from the box on the coffee table. “You took a lot of somethin’, sweetheart...I got home and found ya on the floor lookin’ half dead...” He went quiet for a moment. “Called the ambulance as soon as I could, they should be here any second.” Jack gently stroked Rhys’ hair. “Just hang in there, baby, please,” Rhys mumbled something in reply, however, whatever it was, was something indecipherable for even him. He gave out a sputtering cough, Jack’s large hands rubbing his arm gently as Rhys’ dull eyes examined whatever it was in front of him. “T...tired...” he managed, fingers clenching and unclenching weakly as heavy eyelids began to lower. Jack clenched the boy’s hand tightly, uncaring of the disgusting vomit and saliva that coated his lover’s fingers.

 

 

 

“Rhys, no- now’s not a good time for napping. Ju-Just stay awake a little longer, okay? The paramedics should-“ The older man was interrupted by a loud banging at the door, Jack shouting in reply that the door was unlocked. Rhys’ head lolled from side to side as if to look around himself somehow. Men and women gathered around him, checking his pulse and heart rate as a stretcher was pulled into the room followed by an IV rack. Jack’s strong arms lifted his limp body from the vomit-ridden floor, laying him tenderly on the stretcher and immediately capturing his hand once more. “Y-You’re gonna be okay, Rhysie- I-I promise- you’re gonna be okay, baby goddamnit Rhys, _you fucking better._ ” Jack’s tone went from comforting to dark, the blurry look on his face barely able to be made out by the younger man, but seemed to look as if he was trying to convince himself more than Rhys. Warmth would occasionally splash on his cheek, he assumed it to be Jack’s tears by the wavering of the older man’s voice.

 

 

 

As the stretcher loaded into the back of the ambulance waiting outside, Rhys could feel his consciousness begin to falter, coming in and out as if it were threatening to disappear. The last thing he could remember was Jack’s worried cries and demands to stay awake in the back of the speeding ambulance.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long!! it's a tad rushed, so sorry in advance! but I hope you enjoy :)

The man anxiously sat outside the room where his partner lay bedridden. Jack's elbows rested on each leg, his hands twined and holding his marred face; his body slightly jostling with each anxious tap of his foot.

He shouldn't have left Rhys alone, he knew he should've called Timothy to keep an eye out; drop by and get some grub or something, or to at least call. Jack felt his breath hitch as he waited impatiently for the doctor to leave Rhys' hospital room, emotions swirling around inside like an angry typhoon. 

He knew this was all his fault.

"Godamnit.." he muttered, breath shaking as he viciously blinked away his tears; wiping away any escapees with his wrist. How could he have let this happen?

Jack slung a whisper of curses and prayers from beneath his breath, a hand rushing through his once perfectly coiffed hair and clenching down on the walnut locks as the telltale sound of the opening door kissed his ears. His head shot upwards, eyes wide and mixed with emotion as green and blue locked onto hazel. 

"Jack Lawrence, I presume?" He simply said, Jack's expression morphing into a look of slight surprise as a hand was extended to him; which was taken with great hesitance. The intense, heterochromatic gaze that Jack once held on the other man dropped to the ground beneath his shoes, gripping the hand tightly in their firm greeting handshake.

"That's me." Jack simply replied, a dryness in his tone.

"I'm Doctor Cadbur." The man introduced, adjusting his rectangular glasses as he released Jack's hand from his grip to flip through the array of papers on his carried clipboard. "Seeing the situation, it's best we get decently acquainted," the doctor cleared his throat, fingers running through his short black locks, eyes looking back to Jack's intense glare and displeased expression only to move back to his clipboard with anything but hesitance. "though that's with the assumption you plan to stay throughout Mr. Albrich's hospitalization?" 

Jack didn't even flinch- nor think twice before shooting him a scowl. "You try and make me leave, I'll break your godamn jaw faster than you can say 'pills'." He growled, the darkness in his tone seeming to draw an unexpected chuckle from the man before him. His lips were curved into a humourless smile, his thumb giving an occasional click of his dark green and silver pen. 

"I thought as much." Dr. Cadbur replied calmly, the unphased demeanor both annoying and slightly impressing the older man a tad. It wasn't a second later before it had dissipated into the former seriousness from before. He looked to Jack, rivaling his gaze impressively.  
  
"I'm going to need to ask you some questions, Mr. Lawrence. From what I've read, you two seem to be quite new to the area, it's beneficial to update his medical history and information in case anything has changed." The dark haired man explained with a softness to his voice that made a slight agitation stir within Jack's chest. The scarred man tapped his fingers impatiently on the knuckles of his opposite hand, ocean blue, and sea green gaze boring holes into Cadbur's. Said man took note of the counterpart's hesitance, clicking his pen in his hand out of obvious habit.

"It's not required, just suggest-"

"Just get on with it, asshole," Jack interjected with a growl, his mismatched orbs wandering to the window into Rhys' room as Dr. Cadbur dragged a chair in front of Jack's.

"Was Mr. Albrich on any specific medications for-"

"No. Next question." Jack interjected, his dark tone causing a slight hesitance in the doctor's questioning, taking a moment before eventually scribbling something down on his paper.

"Has the patient been diagnosed with and mental health issues in the past?" Cadbur asked carefully, Jack's low grunt a given "yes".

The young doctor hesitated, knowing he was treading on thin ice. "Can..you please list those off for me?"  
  
Jack paused, taking a moment to exhale as he took a moment to decide if he wanted to answer or not.  _I should_... He thought to himself, calloused fingers running through his loosely coarse hair as he forced the words from his throat. "Last I knew; depression, anxiety, paranoia- maybe PTSD or somethin'." His reply sounded less firm and more soft in his own ears, at which he mentally cursed himself for.

Doctor Cadbur nodded gently, the sound of messy penmanship against paper filling the silence. "Do..you know where this might've originated from? Perhaps some kind of incident that occurred?" He chose his words carefully, each word coming out slower than he intended. Jack simply remained silent, shaking his head softly- as if trying to be rid of a chill.

"I'm not answering that." The reply was flatter than a pancake, yet they hit hard like concrete. Cadbur hesitated before nodding, tucking the pen beneath the clip-boards' clip. 

The room fell into an uncomfortable silence, the air thick with tension as the two men's gazes refused to pass. The only noise being the soft footsteps of nurses throughout the facility, and the muffled beeps of heart monitors from other rooms; that is until Jack spoke up.

"What else? I don't like  _waiting_ , kid." He growled irritably, surprising the younger man- who opened his mouth to speak only to close it again in thought. 

"Right- erm.." Cadbur cleared his throat, giving a soft cough before reclaiming his pen from the clip and clicking it with his thumb. "Has Mr. Albrich ever..succumbed to self-harm of any sort?"

The question leaving him hit Jack like a ton of bricks, memories he'd much rather forget rising to the surface. His eyes glinted with a flash of hurt and sadness, however, it was gone in an instant. Jack swallowed as his foot gave to tapping softly on the tile floor. 

"Yeah. He would scratch himself up a lot." Jack grumbled reluctantly, hiding the crack in his voice with the nagging irritation gnawing at the back of his mind. "I dunno if he's done it recently or not, by the looks of things, he pro'lly did." 

The younger man's eyebrows slowly rose to his forehead at that. "You don't...ask him?" His voice was curious and quiet, however, he immediately jolted as Jack's head shot up, a glare of knives headed his way. 

"Of course I ask him, you idiot. What am I gonna do?  _Force_ the truth outta him?" Jack's voice dripped of disgust and anger. "I'm not a godamned monster, I wouldn't push shit like that onto him." 

Cadbur put his hands up in surrender to the harshness of the older man, eyes blown wide at the sudden change of tone. "I-I'm sorry, Mr. Lawrence- I meant no ill-"  
  
"Shut up." Venom dripped from those two words, the warning clearer than an empty sky. He stood up, hands clenched into fists as he glared down at the doctor before him. "Get the hell outta my sight, I'm done with the questions, and I'm seeing my fucking boyfriend." 

Before he could say anything in protest, the hospital room's door opened and closed, Jack nearly giving in to the urge to slam the heavy door out of frustration- however, deciding otherwise in the end. 

 

_**~~~~~** _

 

It had been about three days since the incident, Rhys had woken up very late the day after his arrival to the hospital to soft snoring and an unpleasantly sweaty hand. At the younger man's awakening, Jack's entire body had shot up, eyes still heavy with sleep yet eyes wide nonetheless. Rhys had smiled lightly at the way Jack's eyes lit up at seeing him, and how cute it was when he pointed out that Jack had drooled a tad on his bedsheets, to which Jack incessantly denied. Though nothing could top the kiss Jack had given him upon realizing Rhys was really awake, the soft pecks peppering his face and hands rushing to cup his cheeks. 

"Hey, pumpkin." He had whispered with a grin as Rhys gave in to the affection of his lover, the dull headache being the last thought on his mind as he basked in Jack's presence. The calloused fingers pleasantly stroked over the other's high cheekbones, heterochromatic eyes alight with bittersweet eagerness. "How ya feelin', babe?"

So many things ran through Rhys' mind, horribly atrocious words and thoughts and theories- all blacked out by the sheer relief and happiness. "Jack..." he started, moisture welling at his tear ducts. "You...you're really here..?" 

The older man let out a low, empty chuckle, his fingers moving to run through his partner's auburn locks. "Of course I am, Rhysie..now why would I be?" 

Rhys couldn't help but hesitate at the question, the millions of unspoken somethings whirling around in his tired mind, things he could never say in front of Jack- let alone  _to_ him. The auburn-haired man simply shook his head in dismissal, smiling softly at the sight of Jack's loving, handsome smile.

"I..dont know.." is what he ended up with, Jack's green and blue eyes examining his lover's brown and blue ones, very aware of the pools swimming with doubt.

"I was here the last few times, no way in hell I wouldn't be here this time." He re-assured, silence settling between one another. The CEO took note of it, knowing Rhys well enough to gather that his mind was giving him all the wrong answers. Jack leaned down, pressing his lips softly to his counterpart's as a large hand cupped the side of Rhys' face. He kept it slow and tender, yet wanting all the same, Rhys' more than pleased to return the act of affection. It wasn't until Jack pulled away, keeping their faces close and their eyes locked. "I love you, Rhysie. You gotta know you aren't alone- not anymore."

The sudden words caused Rhys to tense, said man looking down to his mechanical hand. "I...I love you too, Jack." He returned, a tint to his fine features as his partner leaned forward, enslaving his lips in another tender, loving kiss.

As Jack pulled away, the younger man found himself sad at the loss of warmth that was once placed against him. Jack shot him a small grin, standing tall while still holding to Rhys' flesh hand. "I gotta go take a piss, babe. Need anything? Some crackers or somethin'?" He offered, nearly bumping into the chair he had previously been sitting in before releasing his hand and moseying towards the door. "Doc says you shouldn't eat bigger stuff 'till tomorrow; your vitals are all over the place, cupcake."

The cyborg hesitated, a sick feeling creeping up his spine like spider legs. However, he nodded in response despite himself. "I...think that would be great, Jack." The simple reply caused Jack's face to light up happily, nodding as he gripped the door handle.

"I'll be back in a jiffy, 'kay?" At Rhys' gentle nod, Jack was out the door, closing it behind him before slumping back, a hand coming up to run at the rough start of stubble on his jawline. 

As much as he loved Rhys, as much as he wanted him to be okay, Jack knew he couldn't keep this up much longer. He knew that if it kept up, his beloved, perfect world that was Rhys would eventually be bettered by his own toxic mind again in another attempt on his own life. Jack ran a tender hand through his disheveled locks, the walnut tendrils loose from the lack of attention throughout the days and resulting in what one would call a permanent bed-head.

For a second, Jack let himself break; giving in to the intense stress of the entire situation as his eyes began to water. He can't keep doing this.

He can't keep seeing Rhys so hurt all the time; so broken and desperate for death.

How could he help him? How could he make Rhys see and believe him when Jack insists he loves him?

The man's thoughts were broken into once tears began to dribble down his cheeks, the older man sniffling a tad before wiping the moisture away with a shaky breath.

 _You can't do this now, Jack_. He scolded himself, giving his scarred cheek a gentle slap.  _You gotta be there for him right now, you gotta help him._

 

_You gotta love him like hell._

 


End file.
